How to annoy our best buddies the death eaters!
by dopeypotter
Summary: Ever wondered how to annoy a death eater so bad, that they become murderous? Heres how!


**Ways to annoy Bellatrix**

Tell her, her hair hasn't been electrocuted enough this morning.

Remind her constantly that she failed to get the prophecy.

Pat her on the head when she brings up she killed Sirius then roll your eyes and say aren't you a clever little girl.

Ask her suggest to Voldemort that he should use hair extensions.

Suggest that you start a sing along with the song 'Potter save the Queen'.

Send an owl pretending to be Snape asking for his hand in her marriage.

Send a gift basket with the Harry Potter disk set inside.

Be happy in her presence.

Bounce around the room non-stop for an hour and follow her when she walks away.

Tell her that the chav look would suit her more than goth.

Start hula dancing.

Give her coupons for a hairdressing appointment.

And shampoo.

Add glitter and unicorn stickers to her mask to make her look more friendly.

**Ways to annoy Lucius**

Ask to borrow his curlers.

Suggest highlights to bring out the coldness in his eyes.

Ask for the product he used to receive his awesome summer glow.

Curiously ask him if there is actually mud inside 'mudbloods'.

Tell him the dark mark on his arm makes him look tacky.

Whenever he talks to you nod then whisper 'blondie'.

When his idea's fail tell him it was from his 'blondie' moments.

Call him blonde.

Sneak into his bedchamber at night and gel his hair Jedward style and give Draco matching hair.

Tell him Dobby says hi.

Draw a moustache on his face when he is asleep.

Grab his shoulders and force him into a conga.

Remind him constantly that his hair is blonde not white.

Tell him he would look like Dumbledore if he grew a beard.

Go outside his window and yell Rpenunzel Rupenunzel let down your hair!

**Ways to annoy Snap****e**

Drawl out the word obviously whenever he walks past.

Tell him he needs to sort out his curtains.

Offer to lend him grease remover for his hair.

Ask if he ever cuts himself.

Start singing Harry Potter's name very loudly when he walks past.

Ask for him to rave with you.

Ask to borrow his cloak and get him to do your hair for you for Halloween.

Ask if he wants to go trick or treating with you.

Suggest he dresses as a happy pumpkin.

Tap his shoulder when he isn't looking then turn away.

Stick a note saying "I taught Harry potter and didn't kill him" sign on his back when he is about to talk to lord Voldemort.

Be nice.

Call him Snivellous.

Start singing the potter song very loudly in his ear.

Get little puppet figures and re-act the very potter musical. Be sure to give everyone irritating voices.

Take notes when he is saying horrible things then look up eagerly.

Badger him to go out with Bellatrix.

Keep humming the mysterious ticking noise song to get it into his head

**How to annoy Draco **

Call him little ickle Dracokins whenever he walks past.

Ask to be his best friend forever.

Tell him that his dad paid the hat for him to be in Slytherin, otherwise Draco would of been in Hufflepuff.

Make matching friendship bracelets for you, him, Crabbe and Goyle.

Dye his hair ginger and change his robes for hand me downs so he looks like a Weasley.

Creep him out by smiling like a maniac and waving whenever you see him.

Support Harry in a fight when Draco and Harry are duelling.

Challenge him to a hula hooping competition.

Swap his wand for a fake one that transforms into a rubber chicken when used.

Set Buckbeak on him.

Be in Gryfindor.

**And last but not least (definitely not least...) LORD VOLDEMORT!**

Ask him if he would like some ice for his eyes because they look red.

Ask him if he is wearing a bold cap.

Call him little Tommy or Voldy when he is in a bad mood.

Start singing the Macarena whenever he is about to announce something important.

Make him come to a campfire party.

Give him a stick of marshmallows to melt over the campfire.

Put polyjuice potion in his morning breakfast with some of Harry's hair in it.

Tell him constantly that J.K. Rowling didn't think he deserved a last name so he was stuck with Lord.

Start him on another hobby becides killing, patchwork maybe.

Sing the crazy frog theme tune when an epic battle is about to commence.

Give him nail clippers for his next birthday.

Write Harry Potter rules on the wall with unremoveable ink.

**(IF USE ANY OF THESE TACTICS YOU MAY BE RISKING TO HAVE VERY ANNOYED DEATH EATER/VOLDEMORT ON YOUR HANDS. SO PLEASE RUB IT IN THEIR FACE BEFORE RUNNING FOR YOUR LIFE, ENJOY!)**


End file.
